I just read an interesting article on Marie Claire.com about women planning their weddings while they are still single or dating, not engaged.
You can read that article HERE
It’s interesting to me because I have thought about it for a while, how it can be dangerous for a woman to plan her wedding before she is engaged. Why do I think this? Well, for a number of reasons really.
The first one being that when you are actually engaged you know your timeline, budget and what your groom wants (I know you’re thinking, “what the groom will have an opinion?” Yes he very well might!). The danger in this is that if you plan your wedding before you know your budget and timeline you could be sadly disappointed. Once you actually start planning and booking and putting down payments on items and locations, you see what a real budget looks like and it’s probably more that you imagined. Unless you are independently wealthy- then I suppose it really won’t matter.
You also can’t prepare for life. For example if you always planned a summer wedding, what do you do it your boyfriend proposes in September. Are you willing to wait almost a year to have your perfect seasonal wedding? What if important members of your family are traveling or planning to travel. Are you willing to wait for their return or have the wedding with out them?
I am the first to admit that I started planning my wedding when I was not yet engaged, ask any of my girl friends (even my now husband could tell you!). The biggest thing I found was that when it came down to actually choosing a location, dress, etc lots had changed from what I had in my secret computer file of wedding stuff. I no longer wanted that expensive wedding dress or when I tried on my ‘dream dress’ it didn’t fit or feel the way I wanted it to.
However, for me there were some things that did not change. For example I knew that I wanted to wear cowboy boots, and I did, but this changed the style of my dress a little bit. I also knew I wanted a relaxed, fun wedding instead of a high maintenance and fussy day.
I also think that pre planning your wedding can be dangerous because you will have certain expectations of your ‘perfect’ day. Let me tell you that your ‘perfect’ day will have glitches and hiccups. Life is unexpected and you can’t plan for the weather (if you always wanted outdoor pictures and it rains) or if you always wanted a certain flower and they are out of season when you have your wedding and you blow your flower budget.
So, what are your thoughts on a pre planning your wedding? Did you do it? How did it turn out? Do you have girl friends that are doing it? I’d love to hear from you ladies!